Sunday, August 1, 2010
Random thoughts: Smokers in the workplace
I don't get the concept of a "smoke break." Here in California, if you work an eight hour shift, you typically get a lunch break, then two shorter break periods. You take a break a couple of hours into your shift, relax, then get your ass back to work for a few hours. Well smokers find a way to rape the system.
"Dude, I'm gonna take a smoke break, cover my department." A smoking co-worker said to me recently. He said this forty-five minutes into his shift. So he steps out, fires up a Marlboro, and gets to escape the drudgery of retail for a few minutes. Then an hour later he takes his "actual" break. Hmm, two hours in, and this dope has already taken two breaks. This pattern repeats itself over an eight hour day, and my smoking pal has taken seven breaks to my three. Wait, is that right.
Smoking is apparently an excuse to be a lazy bastard. It is perfectly acceptable to smoke when your supposed to be working, yet if i decide to randomly take a five minute stroll outside, or if I take an unplanned dump, I'm a terrible employee.
Most smokers also have no concept on how bad smoke smells, especially men. If your gonna smell like shit constantly, bring some cologne, a pack of tic-tacs, and freshen yourself up a bit. It's really not that hard fellas.
Perhaps I should just take up smoking, if I feel like slacking off for a few minutes, i can just light up. Can you imagine? "Umm, yeah i can't help that customer in laptops, I gotta go suck on the tit of Camel Joe, I'll catch you guys in five.
I feel it often leaves me out of the social loop. People like to go outside, swap stories over a smoke, and up each other. While Kevin the non-smoker, is forced to sit in the breakroom, alone, watching PBS.
Perhaps its time to start smoking. It may cause premature aging, lung cancer, and bad breath, but I will be able to take more breaks at work, and my social life will improve. Yeah, I think it's a fair trade.
Posted by Kevin Charity at 8:53 PM