Friday, March 25, 2011

Douchebag of the Week: Cameron James Spurlock

This story, brought to my attention yesterday, is one of the more disturbing things I have seen in a while.  Spurlock, a 21 year-old volunteer at the Lowry Park Zoo in the Tampa Bay area, was arrested yesterday, for lewd acts with a child.

Spurlock, was just finishing his shift as a volunteer at the zoo, when he took a trip to the bathroom.  While there, he allegedly pulled down the pants of 9 year-old boy, and fondled the child, then fondled himself.  The kid escaped from the bathroom, told his parents, and Spurlock was promptly arrested.

Normally this story, while horrendous, wouldn't be a national story, yet it is for one reason:  Spurlock suffers from elephantiasis, which is obvious from his mugshot, which makes him look like a cross between Rocky Dennis and the mask of Michael Myers.

I love making fun of people, but making fun of someone with a physical deformity is not my style, although when it comes to pedophiles, all bets are off.  The guy deserves to suffer the same fate as all child molesters in my opinion:  castration.  Can you imagine the therapy bills this kid is going to have now?  Not only was he molested at the zoo, one of my favorite places to visit as a child, but it was done by a Rocky Dennis look-alike, making the event that more traumatizing.

Hopefully Spurlock will do some time, and maybe meet an eligible in the slammer.  Then again, judged upon that mugshot, I'm guessing that Spurlock's sphincter will not be a hot commodity in the shower.  Hopefully for his sake, they allow paper bags in jail.

Cameron James Spurlock, pedophile, circus freak, and now he is the Douchebag of the Week!


  1. douche bag indeed. give him the tampon! - Nicole Bish