Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Random Thoughts: Peeing in the Sink

The headline says it all folks. Over the last few years, I have taken to peeing in the sink. Yes, it does sound pretty gross, but hear me out on this. If you are a guy, you just might do it too.

How many times have you woke up in the middle of the night, with a bladder full of urine, and had to take that long walk all the way over to the toilet. Once you get to the toilet, you have to lift up the lid before you can indulge yourself. At 3am, when you are half-dead, this can be quite the arduous task (especially for this blogger). So one night, a few years ago I just decided to pee in the sink. It was like Christmas morning, and I felt alive. I believed I had a new purpose in life.

When you really think about it, it was like God, or the dude who invented the bathroom wanted dudes to piss in the sink. For most males, the sink is waist high. Coincidentally, our dicks are also waist high. Noticing a trend yet? It also does not have that pesky lid to lift. It is also considerably closer in most bathrooms. I have yet to encounter a bathroom that had the toilet closer than the sink. Hell, in some public restrooms where guys piss in a troth. What is a troth, you say? Essentially, it is a giant sink.

Sure, you crazy broads are going to say "But Kevin, peeing in the sink is sick! That is where you wash you hands, and bush your teeth!" My reply would be something like: "Bitch, the shower is where we wash ourselves. Every guy and many women pee in the shower. Isn't that just as disgusting? I believe so.

This blog is somewhat bittersweet. I feel bad for all my lady friends who will never experience the euphoria of taking a leak in the sink. It really is a little slice of heaven. It has made my life more enriching and satisfying. Let's face it, life kinda sucks sometimes. It is important to find things that truly make you happy, and peeing in the sink makes me happy.

Fellas, if you think this is gross, next time you wake up in the middle of the night, drop your flannel jammies, pull out your wewe and give your sink a little sprinkle. You can thank me in the comments section.